So astonishingly beautiful
As your radiant face
Worshiping
Face down
Bowing in utter submission
Hands open
In complete trust
Tears stream down puffy cheeks
(Mine, not yours)
Little drops finding well-worn rivulets
Of familiar ground
But really, just barely
This is just barely familiar
Barely similar
You are laboring there.
In labor.
Deep breaths
Guttural groans
Waves of agonizing pain
Like I did with my babies
The ones who breathed
And cried
And pinked up in the end
This is no passing of tissue
And grieving a lost lifetime
Imagined for a few weeks
(Which is its own deep, real loss.
Don’t get me wrong.
I sent five lost loves on ahead of me
In that way.
Each one loved.
And released
With a name
And many tears.)
But this.
This is different.
Oh, my precious daughter
You have prepared for
Bought clothes for
Rearranged life for
A new life for all of you
Now a family of three
Heart breaking,
You free fall in terror
And trust
Into your Father’s strong arms
Where Deaniebaby already is
You are closer to both now
Than ever
In this sacred space
© 2025 Laurie Sitterding
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